23 March 2017

Ladies: A Word About Your Pants

I hate purses. I pretty much always have. In college, when I felt compelled by society to carry a purse, I bought a few cheap small ones at the ROSS or Goodwill. Like every other band-geek-sorority-girl-wanna-be, I strutted around with my little bag on one shoulder thinking I looked, like, super cute.

Then my back started to hurt from the unbalanced stress on the body. I'd switch shoulders and find myself annoyed 5 minutes later. It's not like I had a lot of stuff: a wallet, cell phone, chapstick, keys - I'm a pretty low maintenance girl. But add that to the weight of the purse, and even 5lbs over a 15 minute walk on one side can cause discomfort.

Eventually, the purses got pretty filthy from sitting on the floor and being thrown about. Think about it: purses go with you everywhere from a casual toss onto your bed to sitting on the floor of a bar (then back on your bed). Gross.

I finally stopped carrying them altogether. Now, I pull out my ID and credit card, shove it into my undersized pant pockets, and pray they don't fall into the toilet or work their way out of my back pocket. Ladies - I know you feel me on this.

Which is why I'm writing today about pants, pockets specifically, and the magical experience I had with a pair the other day:

Last week I ordered a pair of Dynama Pants from Mountain Hardwear. I tore the bag open when I got home and eagerly tried them on. They fit awesome! They were the right length, weren't tight around the waist, and had the right amount of room for my thighs and glutes. Plus, they were a super light weight material - ideal for a day at the office then a trip to the climbing gym. I was sold.

Then I put my hands in the pockets.

No, seriously, read that again. I could put my. entire. hand. in the pocket.

Never, in my entire life, have I been able to slip my whole hand, so easily, into the pocket of a pair of women's pants. I'm willing to bet you haven't either.

Filled with glee, I exclaimed to my boyfriend, "Look at these pants! I can fit my hand in the pockets! My WHOLE hand!!!" He was not impressed. I went on to explain how this is a really big deal for women's pants and that normally you're lucky if you can fit chapstick in your pocket. To which he responded, "What do women need pockets for? You all want to carry purses anyway."

I don't need to explain why this was the wrong answer.

Women don't want to carry purses. Women need to carry purses because WE DO NOT HAVE POCKETS THAT WILL HOLD OUR BASIC NEEDS.

A gal who calls herself shmree15 posted a review of the pants, and I love it because she agrees with me. "These are the first pair of women's pants I've owned that have four (FOUR!!!) full-size pockets, not those silly little matchbox-sized pockets that most women's pants have. Thank you, Mountain Hardwear. I probably won't buy any other pants but these for a loooong time."

I could go on (and on and on) about society's oppression of women and how fashion is thrust upon us and how women have unrealistic beauty expectations and how it's all one big, terrible farce we live in...but I won't. Instead, I want to celebrate these damn fine Dynama Pants and the incredible gift they are giving to me and women everywhere: POCKETS!

What will you put in yours?

Full Disclosure: I am a "brand ambassador" for Mountain Hardwear. That means, about twice a year, they send me 2-3 things to test drive, provide feedback on, and generally wear and enjoy - no other strings attached. Any promotion or talking about said products is of my own fruition. I felt compelled to write this blog because pockets are apparently pretty important to me, even though I didn't realize it before. After this discovery, I feel a strong urge to share this discover with you - my 10s of readers.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Yes! I agree with your joy of finding a normal size pocket! I can't stand how small pockets are on all my clothes, from pants to jackets. When I wear my boyfriends jackets, the pockets are so amazing. What a difference it makes to have them. Great post!